Reader Mail

April 5, 2010

With my massive fan base, I’m inundated with emails asking me all kinds of crazy things. So I thought I’d take the time to respond.

I found your site while googling Joss Stone for naked pictures. Do you have any?

Of course. What kind would you like? Oh, wait… you mean of Joss Stone. No, I don’t have any of her.

KevFu, love the blog, but you disappear for months at a time. What gives?

College basketball gives. I tend not to think about any interesting things during March Madness… unless you think “THAT’S A FOUL!” “ATTACK THE ZONE!” “REBOUND!” and “STROKE THE THREE!” are interesting.

Women’s Basketball? Really? Are you watching that too?

Kind of. I’ll watch women’s hoops when Dayton and Tulane are involved… or when the men’s tourney ends early on the second weekend and the women are still going on and the TV has got to be on something. That girl from Xavier missing two wide open layups to send her team to the Final Four… ouch. Let’s just say I’m glad there’s nothing that significant that I’m carrying with me for the rest of my life.

What college basketball teams do you hate?

Anyone you’ve heard of, I probably hate to some degree. It’s really a hierarchy of which ones I hate least, fluctuating based on head coach, recent success, and annoyingness of roster.

How’s the job search going?

Well, what positions do you have available?

The rest of the world is talking about the whole health care thing, any thoughts?

No.

You’re Bejeweled Blitz scores are amazing. How do you do it?

Yes. They are amazing. I’m unemployed. What else am I doing all day, besides watching basketball?

Who the F*** are Man United?

You mean the evil Yankees of English Premier League? They are the pile of devils excrement that lies outside the city of Manchester.

Now  that the Olympics are over, you don’t care about curling, do you?

Au Contraire! The Men’s World Championships are going on!

You made the Big Brother audition line seem like it was full of normal people. C’mon, aren’t those people freaks?

Actually, I was surprised to see how many normal people there were. Generally, the people I talked to were kind of like me: extremely social extroverts who are super friendly, easy to talk to, and tend to have a bit of an ‘attention whore’ thing going.

Questions/Comments for Reader Mail can be sent to: kevfu@att.blackberry.net

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Stream of Consciousness V

March 3, 2009

Probably last post of the week as we host the Conference tournament. I know its March when my stomach magically turns off. I was kinda hungry and then couldn’t finish 12 wings. My stomach knows when its tourney time and tells me “I know you won’t have time to eat. Just gimme one meal a day. That’s all I ask.”

Sunday was scary. I woke up at 4:30 am with the deadly feeling that the contents of my stomach wanted out. And I didn’t know which exit they wanted to take. I just had to pray I made it through my two plane connections home.
I thought I was coming down with the evil 24 hour flu. I had it once at it was devesatating. I was incapacitated for 2 days. Nothing stayed down. There were projectile ejections. My whole body, joints and muscles were in intense pain and I could not sleep or function. All I could do was lie on the floor and pray for death.
… and one of our players on the trip had it. This would be the WORST possible time to come down with that, and I felt it coming.
So far, I’ve been okay. I think it was just bad onions from dinner Saturday (stomach), my back was just killing me from the aforementioned Southwest flight, and my knee was hurting from climbing under the bus to grab luggage. My general feeling of sickness was dehydration from a few beers. My exhaustion was due to it being a 5 a.m. wakeup for our flight. And my cold shakes were really just having bare feet on the freezing bathroom floor in 20 degree Tulsa.
Needless to say, I took no chances. I did as much work as possible Sunday night (even thought I felt like doing none), went to bed early, and took a change of clothes to office in case of emergencies. (sorry. Graphic.) Let’s just say I’m eating nothing but crackers to be safe, and taking zero chances.

24 tonight was pretty awesome (subtle spoiling to follow. MASSIVE SPOILERS HERE). Some very unrealistic situations. No way Bauer opens the door, and no way Pierce just sits down on the rug. Also, they probably should have silent clocked Buchanan.

The SEC is a total joke, and it’s laughable that LSU suddenly jumped to #11 in the polls in two weeks after doing nothing but beating bad SEC teams. This is the team that lost by 30 to Utah, and lost at home by 10 to Xavier… and they are ranked ahead of both? The conference logo on the shorts is all that matters.

I love March, but I’m disappointed basketball is almost gone for the collegiate season. If there was another sport waiting in the wings to suck me in. Oh, hi baseball, didn’t see you standing there. The Mets are at Houston during a summer weekend. I’m going to have to trick someone with a David Wright crush into making a road trip to check another ballpark off our lists.