Curling After Dark

MSNBC stands for: Minimal Sleep: Nothing But Curling!

I’m glad curling doesn’t have its own network. Because I’ve watched MSNBC’s Curling After Dark for eight straight days, and I’m not fazed or feeling abnormal that it’s 4:05 am CT. It doesn’t even feel late.

And yes, I do have a DVR, and the 2 am match is taped from earlier in the day anyway, but I don’t care.

Normally, when you watch late night TV, you go to bed when the paid programs and infomercials come on. On Monday, with no “late” hockey game starting at 11 p.m. (CT), Curling After Dark came on AFTER a paid program.  We’re talking the only things on TV are paid programs, curling and soft-core porn movies (if I had those channels).

England’s Eve Muirhead leads a cast of curling hotties

Actually, the curling commentary is so full of double entendres that it sounds like play by play of a soft-core porn movie:

“He just needs to slide it in there, nice and tight.”

“A full 12 inches would really do some damage to Debbie McCormick and the Americas”

“She wants to rub it off right there and slide it right onto the button.”

“Johnson delivers the money shot!”

(I swear those are real. Maybe not verbatim, but paraphrased. It probably wasn’t Johnson.) But you get the idea.

I was at happy hour with friends Thursday, and we put curling on the TV at the bar. While explaining it to people around me, I realized just how much I know about curling compared to everyone else on the planet who’s not Canadian.

2 Responses to Curling After Dark

  1. f says:

    Hahahahah great post. What a win by kevin martin!!!

  2. Sinn Sage says:

    But that bitch so crazy that bitch gon kill me

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