I’m so upset that I missed the spelling bee. Not on TV, because I did watch some of it. I meant to gamble on.
Each year for the past few seasons, some of my old co-workers and I have gambled on The Bee. We pick five little nerds and the last person with a pick standing wins.
One year, we were out at a bar and our friend was a no show. We called him to find out where he was, and he refused to leave his home before the end of the Bee. Naturally, we assured him it wasn’t a problem, since we commandeered the bar’s big screen TV to watch the end.
The other great memory of the Bee was last year, when I did my research, picked five little MENSA’s to win, and got absolutely crushed in the pool.
By 2 p.m., I was down to one left. My strategy of picking home schooled kids might have backfired as they crumbled under the pressure of being around people who were not their parents.
Distraught, I went to my co-workers office, to lament about my misfortune. I fired off a rant about how home-schooled kids are not mentally tough, sheltered little losers without a competitive edge doomed for a life of loneliness and social retardation.
The smirk on my coworker’s face was obvious, but evil. His wife was sitting there — she already knew I’m kind of a jerk.
And she replied “I was home schooled.”
That was awesome. Luckily, she admitted most of those traits were accurate for home schooled kids and the ones she felt did not apply to her could certainly apply to spelling bee kids. So I’m lucky she’s a cool person and one of this site’s most loyal followers.